It’s simple: if you can’t find it on Ventura Boulevard, you don’t need it.
Oh sure, Ventura Boulevard must replenish its raw materials from various places. Mountains, say, for mountain goats to produce feta cheese at Whole Foods. Prairies for the semolina wheat that goes into the fine croissants sold at The Baker. Forests primeval for the paper required by Borders and Barnes ‘n’ Noble. Plantations for the cotton, oceans for the crab delight and so forth.
Apart from those trifles, Ventura Boulevard is as close to a self-sustaining enclosed ecosystem as you are likely to find on earth. Certainly it has gone on longer than Bioshpere 1 or 2, and it doesn’t require sealed hatches.
Need a California Roll? Try Makoto Sushi, or Sushi Ohana or Katsu-Ya or Edo Sushi, or any one of dozens of other Japanese restaurants. Prefer to cook at home? Why there’s not one but two Barbecues Galore, one in Tarzana, the other in Studio City (neither too far, by the way, from the two Peet’s Coffee Houses of which Ventura Blvd can boast). Eaten too many spareribs and in need of a nap? Well, Ventura Blvd can offer you a Sit ‘n’ Sleep, but as we found out last weekend, the name of that mattress store better describes the sales staff than the merchandise, and so we recommend the Ortho Mattress, also on Ventura in Woodland Hills.
You get the picture: San Antonio Comfort Shoes? Cohiba cigars? Rare guitars? Ancient coins? Vintage wine? Location shots for Monk? Acting classes? Pet grooming? Una chimichanga grande? Winsor & Newton cerulean blue gouache? Hummingbird feeders? Native American turquoise jewelry? All your surfin’ needs? Skull Kingdom? It’s yours, all yours. Only stay on Ventura Boulevard, Seeker. The rest of the country is just for storage.